Secularism…secularism….secularism….that’s what contemporary Indian politics is all about. Talk secularism, eat secularism, sleep secularism or fart secularism… even if it stinks or rots you have to hold it dear to your chest. 

The world today is ripe with examples of ‘Christian’ and ‘Muslim’ countries where government swears and acts in the name of God. Religious taxes are collected, religious activities sponsored and stamps and seals of the government representing the religion.

Hindus formed an overwhelming 80 percent of the nation’s population at the time of independence and it ought to be have been declared a Hindu nation. This never happened as Hindus had put full faith in the system and their political leaders.  This was the costliest mistake.  Little did they know that they are mere rats marching to the tune of the pied pipers of a foreign religion. Singing the secular tune, these pied-pipers have been leading these clueless Hindus to their own grave.

Mahatma Gandhi gave the wonderful slogan ‘do or die’ while Sonia Gandhi fine-tuned it as ‘convert or perish’. While Mahatma’s message was for the whole of the nation, Sonia Gandhi’s message is loud and clear only to the Hindus.

Yes of course, nobody deprives you the right to live. Survival is easy provided you do not hesitate to sport a skull cap or get a lousy cross dangling from your neck. What more, you can continue to be ‘de-jure’ Hindus and still live provided you keep proving your ‘secular credentials’.
Fortunately, proving your secular credentials is quite easy and fun too. Here are some illustrations which can help turn you to a ‘master secular’ in mere thirty days.

• Some idiot draws obscene pictures of your God….you say ‘wow’…..
• Someone knocks your door asking a can of kerosene to burn the temple… you contribute two
• Your father says Ram Ram Jai Jai Ram….. you say Rome Rome Jai Jai Rome
• When terrorists are shot dead, rush to the streets shouting ‘false encounter’
• When LeT claims responsibility deny that…say ‘Hindu Terrorists’ are responsible
• When killer Italian marines flee, see them off at the airport
• When Chinese army intrudes in Arunachal Pradesh, invite them to Kerala.

Hindus are tolerant, so tolerant that when they ask us to bend, we crawl. Tamil comedian Vadivel says in a movie “Evlo adichaalum summa irukaan. Ivan romba nallavan”….. that’s exactly what we are…..romba Nallavan. 

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